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A True Story of Twenty-first Century Jazz
by Erin Hagood

I once got on the train at 125th street by the old Apollo theater that runs express to Columbus Circle (a ten-minute ride). A man walks on just as the doors are closing. Just like Harlem’s buildings, he’s dressed in about seven different decades. The social consternation of a century of accumulated history brings with it an equally rotten taste in fashion. Amidst the fuchsias and scarlets and faded yellows, I hardly noticed he was holding a mint-condition pure gold saxophone.

As the train leaves the station he begins playing a chaotic series of tones. A dilettante’s Mahler it is ‘rough’ and ‘spontaneous.’ Really, ran ricocheted hostile forces in the shuddering metal can ‘til your vital forces (brain and flesh) were reduced to a punchcard.

The man stopped playing and pronounced to his captives:

I AM AN ALIEN

“I am from outer space and YOU cannot know ME! Give me money or I will hurt your ears!”

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